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Showing posts with label pie recipe. Show all posts
Showing posts with label pie recipe. Show all posts

Tuesday, August 11, 2020

Mini Apple Poptarts



I have a secret. Do you promise not to tell my friends? I hope it won't ruin me!

I love Poptarts. I really do! I know that I'm supposed to be this serious and sophisticated Chef at this point in my career. I know I'm meant to have a sophisticated palette. But what can be done when the heart wants what the heart wants? There's just something so amazing about a sugar-packed pastry filled with fruit and topped with frosting! Am I wrong for loving them? I don't know about that...but I do know that recently experienced a tiny tragedy a few weeks ago.

I bought a Poptart from a gas station. (I was in a rush and experiencing a sugar crash, so don't judge me.) I took a big bite of it while I was driving and felt like I was being kicked in the teeth by a tiny sugar monster. I was utterly heartbroken. Am I just too old for Poptarts? Have I outgrown them? But how can one 'outgrow' the perfect parcel of pastry and fruity filling, crisp and crumbly and delicious? It was just too horrible to be true. I set this experience in the back of my mind until I received my farm box from Prairie Birthday Farm and happily opened a bag of Windfall apples. 

Yes! I thought. These apples weren't the pretty things you see in the grocery store, but the real apples that you get off the farm. I could make apple pie, of course, but what if I could take the opportunity to right the wrong of that Poptart experience I'd had some weeks prior? These apples were perfect for baking, and I was about to do just that. Here's another thing you need to know: Not every single produce item you have has to be absolutely gorgeous, especially if it's going to be put in something, versus presented to guests as is. The truth of the matter is that apples will simply jump their way off a tree when it's ready to be eaten and if it's found on the ground that doesn't mean that it is any less edible. We can talk more about that later!

Mini Apple Poptarts
yields 12 mini pop tarts

Perfect Pie Dough
  • 14 oz all-purpose flour
  • 2 oz granulated sugar
  • 8 oz vegan butter/any solid fat
  • Vodka, as needed
Apple Filling
  • 6 small apples or 2 big ones, peeled and chopped
  • 3.5 oz raw or brown sugar
  • Zest and juice of 1 lemon or 1 Tbsp apple cider vinegar
  • 2 Tbsp tapioca starch
  • 1 1/2 tsp Mexican vanilla extract
  • 1/2 tsp ground cinnamon 
  • 1/2 tsp Chinese long peppercorn
  • 1/4 tsp salt
  • 1/8 tsp ground allspice
  • 1/8 tsp cayenne pepper
Special equipment
  • A proper rolling pin
  • A fluted square cutter
  • A Silpat mat
Start with your pie dough. I know I've talked about it plenty of times, but I cannot stress enough how important it is to start with cold ingredients. Chop your cold fat, and put it into your cold dry ingredients. Rub your fat in with your fingers - not your palms - to keep it cool. Add cold vodka. Are you curious about what the actual mixing method is? Check it out - I've actually done a video about it!




Now that that's all settled, wrap your pie dough and chill it well! I like to let it chill overnight, but an hour will do the trick just fine if you don't want to wait. Are we ready to move on to the filling? I sure am!

Protip: The trick to doing good pop tarts is to chop the apples large enough to still have a sort of bite when eaten, but small enough to fit into your tart of size. I cut my pieces into thin slices and then had those slices cut to 2 cm in length. This, of course, all depends on the size you want, so please feel free to decide what size you feel appropriate! No matter what, make sure that your slices are all the same size, so they cook evenly.

Combine your apples with the sugar, lemon juice or vinegar, salt, vanilla, and spices, and stir well. Cover with a clean tea towel and let sit for about half an hour to extract all of those delicious juices and that wonderful pectin. This is called maceration, and it's used to soften fruits for sauces or fillings, while also making the flavors more intense. Keep in mind: the longer you let the apples sit, the more juices will escape and the more your flavors will meld...so feel free to start this the day before you want these treats! While we're waiting, let's talk a little bit about apples and the perfectly imperfect fruit that they are.

Apples originated in Central Asia. The apple as we know it was brought over by the European colonizers. Although technically an invasive species, we have plenty of delicious varieties that grow better in certain climates. Apples enjoy a temperate climate and require other apple trees nearby to cross-pollinate, which makes it difficult to grow and manage if you don't have a decent amount of space. The good news: you can dwarf an apple tree! This means that they'll grow out, not up, which is much easier to manage when harvesting! Shall we talk about harvesting apples, now?





The apple tree is an exceedingly clever plant, as it'll simply boot off any apples it deems ripe enough to eat instead of waiting for someone to pick it. This results in bruising, and bruised apples never get picked to go to the grocery store. This is not so great, since bruised apples are entirely edible. Apples do ripen quickly, however, so if you don't get them off the ground as soon as you can, they risk fermenting and trust me when I tell you this: drunk squirrels are funny, drunk hornets are not. 

I could go on and on and on about food waste and the problematic practices of how we harvest produce in this country. I'm guessing, however, that you are ready to cook your apple filling...so let's get to it!


Now that your apples have macerated, you're ready to add your tapioca starch! I love tapioca starch for this because it cooks quickly, is crystal clear when set, and mimics the jelly-like texture of pectin most naturally. Cook your apple filling over medium-low heat until most of the liquid has been reduced and thickened, about ten minutes, and set aside to cool. You'll want your apple filling to be at least room temperature for this next step!

Roll out your pie dough between two greased parchment sheets or between two long sheets of plastic wrap. This prevents you from making a mess! Roll it as thin as you can, about 1/8th of an inch, and use a cutter of your choice to cut shapes of equal sizes to make your tarts. Remember, each tart is going to use two pieces of cut dough. I had this gorgeous little fluted ravioli cutter that I found at a garage sale, so I decided to use that! You can use egg wash to help 'glue' your two pieces together, but water works just fine if you want to keep it vegan. 


Use a scoop or large spoon to portion equal parts of your cooled apple filling onto the bottoms of each tart and loosely sandwich the top piece to it. Allow the top dough to relax around the filling and press gently around the edges to get rid of any air bubbles. I used a fork to crimp the edges of my tarts, but you can use your fingers and pinch them together if you like. Make sure you poke some vent holes in the top!

At this point, you can freeze them for later. Why would you do that? So you can have them to either stick in the toaster oven in the morning for a quick breakfast! Even better, if you wanted to get a little crazy, you could deep fry these beauties at 375 degrees until golden-brown for an insanely indulgent take on the apple Poptart! If you're a traditionalist like yours truly, though, and you simply cannot wait to dig in, feel free to bake these beauties at 375 degrees F for 20 minutes, or until golden-brown and delicious. Let them cool completely before you handle them. You can frost these with a simple powdered sugar glaze or buttercream, but I like them plain. They're a perfect little snack to beat the mid-afternoon slump!

I adore this recipe because it's easy to make ahead, and they're just oh so cute to look at and eat. It's got all the beauty of an apple pie combined with mobility. You can wrap these in paper and take them on a picnic, or pop them in your purse for an on-the-go sugar boost. You can grab one on the way out the door. Heck, put one in your pocket while you wander the wild and windy moors, lamenting over that handsome stranger that shot partridge on your land just Sunday last. The possibilities are endless!

Thank you so much, as always, for joining me today. I hope this has inspired you to try this recipe on for size. Now please excuse me while I help myself to some apple pie a la mode with my husband. Happy cooking and happy eating!


Friday, August 7, 2020

Pear Streusel Pie

 


The fruits of summer are bountiful and sweet! There's nothing quite like the summer in the city, except when you are in your 30s and you live in the American Midwest or South. Then, it's just awful, especially if you are an *ahem* ample person of the feminine persuasion, such as myself. (Sweat happens to humans with bosoms and thick thighs in a way that I wish not on others.) Summer sucks. It's hot. It's humid. I'm going to tell you that I hate humidity, so I count the days until fall occurs. I relish the changing leaves, and I mark days off my calendar until I can go apple picking. There is, however, the wonderful fruit that ripens just before the apple does, and I can get my crisp fruit pie fix...the pear. 

Pears are wonderful fruits that don't get nearly enough love. They're crisp and cool, they have delicious varieties that are vastly varied, and they grow on trees so you can pick them while imagining your perfect life in the south of France as you do it! They are not always as sweet as the apple, so therefore you can use them in savory and sweet applications. A grated pear in a marinade for a Korean-style beef marinade will add a note of freshness and sweetness without being overwhelming. How wonderful! 

I'm sure you've seen pears with cheese plates and your parents will remember poached pears with ice cream in fancy restaurants in the late 80s to early 90s. Heck, I myself am guilty of putting the retro-classic poached pear on a modern dessert because I love it so much! There's just something about the pear that heralds in the changing of the seasons for me. It bakes in a wonderful end-of-summer pie.  Here's how to make it!



End-of-Summer Pear Pie

Pie Dough

  • 4 oz vegan butter
  • 7 oz all-purpose flour
  • 1 oz raw sugar
  • 1 oz dark rum, more as needed
Pear Filling
  • Four medium-sized local pears, peeled and sliced thin
  • Juice and zest of 1 lemon
  • 3.5 oz raw or brown sugar
  • 1 tsp good Mexican vanilla
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  • 1/2 tsp cinnamon
  • 1/8 tsp cayenne pepper
  • 1/8 tsp Chinese long pepper, ground
  • 2 Tbsp all-purpose flour
Honey Streusel
  • 5 oz all-purpose flour
  • 4 oz sugar
  • 1 oz local honey
  • 3 oz vegan butter, cold

This is my standard pie dough, and I absolutely love making it because it's suitable for decorating as well as tasty eating. Combine the flour and sugar in a bowl along with a fat pinch of salt. Roughly chop the butter into cubes and rub into the flour-sugar mixture with your fingertips, almost as if you were snapping your fingers. You only want to combine the flour until it looks like cornmeal, and then add in the rum. Turn all of this out onto a cool, marble surface and smear together, folding all the dough back on itself over and over again until everything is smooth and combined. Scrape together, wrap tightly in plastic wrap, and chill for at least 1 hour, ideally overnight. 

Take your pears in a large bowl and toss it with the lemon juice and zest first before adding the sugar and spices. Cover this beautiful stuff and let it sit for 20 minutes at room temperature. The sugar and spices will draw pear juice out, and this beautiful liquid is going to make your pie taste delicious! Why don't you go ahead and turn on your oven to 350 F while you wait?


Meanwhile, lay more plastic wrap on your counter turn your dough out onto the surface. Rolling out your dough on plastic wrap or greased parchment paper will save you a lot of cleaning time! The idea is that you want to sandwich your pie dough between the parchment or plastic wrap and roll it out this way, so you don't have to add excess flour. Roll this out nice and thin and line a glass or ceramic pie dish and press into the corners so it's well-set. Let it hang out on the counter for about five minutes so the pie dough can relax a little before you trim the edges. This will prevent excessive shrinking! Once the dough has relaxed, trim the edges with a sharp paring knife and pinch around the edges to make a pretty scalloped finish. Take this opportunity to think about what kind of decorations you'd like to have on your pie! I chose feathers. 



I have this wonderful set of teardrop-shaped cutters that I discovered at a garage sale some years ago. All you have to do to make feathers is to take the excess dough that you've cut off, roll and cut out the shapes, and then use the back of the knife to make your cuts and indents. You can get really creative with what you put on your pie, so feel free to let your imagination run wild! Remember, any sort of decorative pie crust touch you make will need some egg wash to stick.

To make the streusel simply mix all ingredients together in a bowl with a spoon. You'll be chopping and stirring the fat until everything sort of comes together in a kind of loose and lumpy sand, which shouldn't take long at all. Streusel is ready once it comes together when you ball it in your fist and it keeps its shape but quickly crumbles apart when tapped with a spoon.  

When you're ready to bake, brush your pie shell, edges included, quite well with egg wash. Add the flour to your pear pie filling and stir well to coat. You can use cornstarch if you like, but flour works just fine. Scrape your pie filling into the dough shell and arrange so that the slices are generally flat. Sprinkle your streusel all over the top to cover it, and decorate your pie as you so desire to. I really love the random look of these feathers strewn here and there! You can do whatever shapes you like; this is your pie, so you choose!

Bake at 350 for 50 minutes, or until the filling is bubbling and everything's golden-brown and delicious-looking. Your house is going to smell amazing! Turn off the oven and crack the oven door, and let it cool in the oven for about half an hour. Remove from the oven and let sit on the counter for at least 3 hours. Why? Pectin!

Pectin is this wonderful stuff that's found in high amounts in apples, citrus fruits, and - you guessed it - pears! It's a natural thickener and is essential for making homemade jams and jellies. The only thing about pectin is that it needs to set on its own, so that means you shouldn't cut this pie until it's cool to room temperature and the pectin is set. This way, you'll get much cleaner slices and you'll be able to enjoy that picturesque view of a non-soggy-bottom when you go back for a second, third, or fourth slice of pie. If you cut this pie before the pectin sets, the liquid will burst out and soak up your crust from the bottom, and it'll never set again. 

But what if I want warm pie??? 

Easy! Once it's all cooled, you can reheat it by the slice in the oven or - if you must - the microwave, and serve with some ice cream or sweetened ricotta cream. My general rule is that fruit pies should be served plain with coffee, but if you absolutely must indulge in some sort of ice cream, then I simply cannot stop you. Let go and let G-d, I say!

I love this pie because it's not too sweet but satisfies my sweet tooth in a much lighter way than an apple pie does. Pears are quite fragrant in a sexy, sophisticated way. I like to think of apple pie as your cute neighbor that just loves to wear bright patterns, whereas pear pie is that sexy stranger at the end of the bar wearing just enough of that expensive cologne or perfume...but when you get to the bar you see it's your neighbor, all along, in a new light. 

Thanks so much for reading along and spending some time of your day with me. It means so much to me to be able to pass on these awesome skills I've acquired over the last decade to you. I hope I inspire you to make this delicious pear pie. Happy cooking and happy eating!

Sunday, December 23, 2018

Lucky Charms Pie

I think I was supposed to be a stoner. I think whatever deity made me just
sculpted 90% of a stoner and forgot to flip the final switch. 
I have no idea what this is and I frankly don't even want to talk about it. I have no idea why it worked out or how in the world it even crossed my subconscious, but it did. Strap in, my tchotchkes, because you're going to learn how to make one of the craziest pie recipes I've ever made. It's not really crazy because it's got some wild technique that I've invented - it's just....wild. Like, who in the world would ask for a Lucky Charms Pie? My subconscious, that's who.

Several days ago I woke up thinking of a Lucky Charms Pie. Somehow, it was in my dream the night before. It was such a weird dream, but I didn't tell my husband about it because I couldn't recall the actual plot of it. Fast forward through the day and it was easily one of the worst days at work in memory. I don't want to talk about it, so don't ask, but just know that I was already emotionally drained from returning home from Tucson after my great-grandmother's funeral. I basically didn't have it in me... And more and more was happening, even after the work day had technically ended. I was throwing things at this point and my husband asked me if he could do anything for me. I was so mad I couldn't think, so I just asked him to go get me a soda or a crunch bar or some kind of sweet, textured thing while I cooked dinner. He came back with sodas, a crunch bar, some OJ (for him) and a box of Lucky Charms. Naturally, I burst into tears.


via GIPHY

It was like a sign. The Gods of the Good Kush wanted me to make this stupid pie. I was already up to my elbows in tortellini, though, so of course I wasn't going to make it tonight. I did, however, have the perfect opportunity to do it the following Sunday when I was having a brunch/dinner with my friends.

See, my friend had never had mimosas before. As a Crowned and Anointed Basic Bitch I couldn't let this stand, so I bought some cava and some pulp-y orange juice for the mimosas. I thought about making french toast but since we'd be meeting around dinner time I figured I'd make a quiche. And since I was making pie dough already...

I'm sure you can see where I'm going with this.

I made a whole wheat pie crust to work with both the savory and sweet...and because I wasn't really doing anything truly healthy at dinner and we were having booze after, it somehow made me feel better to do a whole wheat crust on this thing. I kept it neutral in flavor so it would work for both. You can obviously use store-bought pie crust but feel free to use my recipe below.

Lucky Charms Pie
yields one ungoldly horror of a pie, 9" across, serves 8

Pie Crust
  • 350 g AP flour
  • 150 g whole wheat flour
  • 150 g vegan butter substitute (or dairy butter, whatever you like)
  • 150 g vegetable shortening
  • 1 tsp granulated sugar
  • 1 fat pinch of kosher salt
  • Rum, as needed
Lucky Charms Cereal Milk
  • 475 ml (or 2 cups) soy milk
  • 1 cup lucky charms plus more to garnish, divided
  • 1/2 c (100 g) granulated sugar + more later...you'll see
  • 1/4 c (31 g) icing/confectioner's/powdered sugar
  • 6 eggs, separated
  • 1 fat pinch of kosher salt
  • Blue food coloring, if desired
First thing's first, you're going to make the pie crust. Start by rubbing the fat into the flours and salt using your fingertips. You can also place your flour in the bowl of a standing mixer with your paddle attachment and adding in all of your fat, stirring until everything is sort of incorporated and the fat looks to be about pea-sized. You can also pulse your pie ingredients in a food processor. Whatever. Everyone has their own way to make pie dough, you can use yours. 

I like to use rum in my pie doughs because it has a genuinely nice flavor and alcohol won't form gluten like water will. I like to have my doughs be rather short, so I kind of like to take every precaution I can to have a nice short crust. Yay! 

Either way, bring your dough together and allow to chill for at least one hour before rolling out. This will make enough dough for two pies plus plenty for decoration, so feel free to cut this recipe in half. I just always make this amount in case I need to make two pies. And hey! It's great to have extra on hand. 

While your pie dough is chilling, make the cereal milk by pouring a whole cup of this yummy marshmallow cereal into your soy milk (you can use dairy milk, if you want - it's your pie) and stir. Get everything wet and let sit for about 30 minutes in your fridge.You don't want to bring your milk to a boil and then infuse it in the hot way, like you would a tea. Just be patient and do it this way. In the meantime, separate your eggs and let them come up to room temperature. You can use all six egg whites, but I only used three since I didn't know how much of a sugar coma I wanted to put my friends into. Besides! You can freeze egg whites perfectly to make an excellent macaron later on.

Use cutters, use braids...use whatever you like! This is your pie.
Once the dough is chilled and rested, please feel free to go nuts with the decoration. You'll be par-baking this crust at 350 degrees F for 20 minutes before baking the custard in with it. This way, no soggy bottoms. We don't like soggy bottoms. I did end up using parchment paper and some baking beads. You can use rice, dry beans, and more - just PLEASE make sure to use parchment paper to line it with first, and poke some holes in the bottom of the crust to allow some steam to vent. Otherwise, this could turn into a big gloopy gross mess. 

After it's baked, turn the oven down to 325 degrees and place the pie pan on a cookie sheet. Then take the cookie sheet and place it in the middle rack of the oven. Go ahead and open up the oven to let the heat come out and pull the rack out about halfway so that the pie is sitting in the oven already. Trust me on this because you'll thank me later. You won't have to walk to the oven with a slippery and hot pie crust with sloshy liquid!

Using a spatula, mix the egg yolks with both the powdered and granulated sugars. I like a spatula instead of a whisk because I don't want too much air in this. Basically, I stir and press to make a smooth sort of custard-looking texture, and this way I won't get a foam on top. I then strain the cereal milk liquid into the eggs, slowly, and stir in until everything is incorporated. Make sure you scrape from the bottom and try not to agitate it too much! Next, add your salt and - if you like - the food coloring. I noticed that the dyes from the cereal turned my milk a faint blue color, and I just felt like going fully psychedelic with this. Again, you don't have to! I just chose to. 

Discard the soggy cereal and strain this entire mixture into a pitcher. Push the rack back, the pie shell directly in to the oven, while sitting on the tray, and pour your custard into the shell. Now simply bake for about 40 minutes, or until the custard is just barely set. My oven took about 40 minutes, but yours might take more or less time. I'd say just check it at 30 and then see.

When the custard shows a slight wobble, in the middle, turn your oven off and open the oven door a crack. Let the custard sit in the oven for another 20 minutes to gently carry-over cook. This will give you a smooth-as-silk finish. If you had bubbles or foam on the top, it might have browned slightly. This is okay, as we're covering the whole pie with meringue later.

Once it's all done with it's pre-cool, remove your pie from the oven and pop it straight in the fridge. I'd let it cool for at least an hour, but give it two if you can. When you're ready to serve, get your mixer ready.

Using a very clean bowl and a very clean whisk attachment for your standing mixer or hand mixer, pop in as many egg whites as you like. The rule for me is that a perfect meringue is about 1/4 c granulated sugar per large egg white. This means that, for three egg whites, I used 3/4 c of granulated sugar. To make a perfect meringue, make sure your equipment is super clean and super dry. I like to have a pot of simmering water at the ready, and set my bowl - egg whites inside - over the heat. Using a whisk, I like to stir in the sugar by hand, whipping gently to foam and dissolve the sugar. Once it's a fairly warmer than body temperature and all foamy and dissolved (I think 160 degrees F/71 degrees C if you want to be precise) remove it from the heat. Then use your electric mixer to bring it up, on high, until the peaks are stiff, glossy, and about tripled in volume. The meringue shouldn't slide out of the bowl at all and should hold its shape. Delicious!

This is another way you can get really creative. Once my cooled pie was ready, I heated the oven to 350 again. I used a piping bag to make the designs around the edges for mine, or at least for half of it, and then dumped the rest on in a pile just to cover the top of the custard. You can really just go nuts on how you want to decorate this, so long as at least half of the meringue is baked. I baked mine for about 5 minutes in the oven, just until the tips were lightly brown. You can also use a torch, if you like! Either way, I baked the custard, piped on some fresh meringue to help stick the garnishes, and then topped my pie with a big fat handful of the Lucky Charms cereal. You can add some white chocolate bits, some chocolate candies, and even some rainbow sprinkles, if you like! Just please don't go too crazy with other flavors. You want to have the real flavor of this crazy cereal as much as possible!

Serve to your friends and watch them begin to giggle like schoolgirls at the taste of this crazy thing...which is straight-up cereal. Hilarious and fun! It's a great treat for a party or for your holiday fun. Speaking of which, I hope you all have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! I might just make this crazy thing again for Tuesday. We'll see!




A post shared by Chef Kolika (@wannabgourmande) on

Happy cooking and happy eating. 

Sunday, July 15, 2018

New-Fashioned Buttermilk Pie


Okay so it's not real buttermilk, but you can use this recipe (if you so choose) to do so, but I used entirely dairy-free options. As always, Blue Diamond's Almond Milk is my dairy of choice in my home for drinking, and I cannot praise the virtues of Earth Balance's vegan butter enough. But why make a buttermilk pie without buttermilk? Because I wanted it, Karen. Geez.

Let me start off by saying that when it comes to cooking and baking, you won't go to prison for trying something new and experimenting for yourself. A buttermilk pie is a wonderful thing, and there's something just so summery about it. It's a American Southern Classic and oughtn't be forgotten. There are tons of pieces of American Southern culture that are just awesome - not the racism and the slavery, of course, but things like fried chicken, cornbread, and buttermilk pie? Oh yes.

I first learned how to make the classic buttermilk pie when I was working at an assisted living facility while I started up my bakery, which allowed me a lot of freedom to make what I liked, so long as the folks living there had enough to eat. Working with the elderly has some drawbacks, but a lot of rewards - some of them were alive during some crazy times, and I even had one lady that told me stories of her travels all throughout Budapest, Prague, Italy. I had many that had come 'up north' from the deep south and grew up during the Jim Crow segregation era. One of the women specifically requested a buttermilk pie, so I made the classic version. It was delicious, of course, but I can't have that in my house with the amount of dairy that's in it. So? What's a gal to do? Make up her own version of course!
"Yaaaaaaaay pie!"

This recipe is adapted from a blog I love called Spicy Southern Kitchen. Try hers for the old-fashioned version!

Oh, and if you want to master pies for yourself on your own accord with a little more instruction, one of my favorite reference books is Pies and Tarts, written by the Culinary Institute of America - or CIA, if you like. You can pick it up here! It's an excellent reference book and has many different recipes inside, both sweet and savory, and has plenty of info on the hows and the whats and the whys. I've adapted their all-butter crust to suit my needs in this particular application. I find that it's just excellent, especially for decorative motifs on pies that you must pull together in a pinch. Honestly, it's the fastest pie dough I've ever made, and I recommend it - especially if you don't have a food processor or an entire afternoon to devote to this project.

New-Fashioned Buttermilk Pie
yields 1 9" pie, serves 8

Whole wheat crust
  • 14 oz locally ground whole wheat flour
  • 10 - 12 small mint leaves, chiffonade
  • 1 tsp powdered sugar
  • 6 oz cold vegan butter substitute, cubed rather small
  • 1 tsp white vinegar
  • Ice water as needed
Buttermilk Custard
  • 3 large eggs
  • 10.5 oz (1 1/2 cups) fair trade cane sugar (you can also use brown sugar or honey, if you like!)
  • 4 oz (1 stick) vegan butter substitute
  • 1 vanilla bean, scraped
  • 3 Tbsp flour or 1 Tbsp cornstarch
  • 3/4 cup almond milk
  • 1/4 cup vegan sour cream substitute (I like tofutti)
  • 1 tsp white vinegar
  • 1 pinch of salt
  • 1/8 tsp nutmeg
To make the crust simply bring together in either a food processor with pulses, or use your fingers to pinch and push in the fat to the flour. Once the fat is small enough and incorporated enough that it looks to be about the size of a pea, you're ready to add your liquids. Add first the vinegar, then the water, a few drops at a time, until everything just barely comes together. Turn out the dough onto a cold marbled surface. Starting from the edge, use the meat of your thumb and palm to smear a bit of the dough out. Continue to smear and push until everything is homogeneous. This is a technique I like most called 'frasier.' Watch this video below to see for yourself! 



Once that's all together nicely, divide in two and wrap one of them in clingfilm for later use. You're going to place the other half between two sheets of clingfilm and roll it out that way. Simply gather together in a disc, sandwich between the film and roll out gently, turning and rotating as needed, to roll out to at least a quarter-inch thickness. Pop this in your pie pan by simply peeling off the top layer, putting the pie pan over it upside-down, and then carefully flipping everything over! Gently peel away the now-top layer of plastic and ever-so-gently lift up the edges so that the dough can sink into the crevices of the pie dish. Let it sit in there for about five minutes, in the fridge, so that the dough can relax and therefore won't shrink on you. 

Once rested, trim the edges and save the dough to make decorations. I love making leaf shapes using cookie cutters, but you can crimp the edges, scallop or prick with a fork...the sky's the limit! This is your pie, so you can decorate it how you please to do so. 


Prick the bottom of the pan and pop this in the freezer while your oven heats to 350. Move your oven rack to the bottom of the oven, as low as it'll go. Once it's come up to temp, par-bake your pie crust for 10 minutes at the bottom of the oven, sitting on another sheet tray that's been lined with aluminum foil. I suggest blind-baking using aluminum foil or parchment paper filled up with beans, pie beads, rice, lentils...whatever you have lying around. You'll only want to bake this for 10 minutes because it's going to hang out in the oven for another 50 after this. You just want to ensure that you don't have a soggy bottom.

Now, to make the custard! Scrape the insides of the vanilla bean into the butter and melt gently over medium heat. Make sure you either put your scraped vanilla bean in either the sugar container or into a bottle of cheap vodka or bourbon with other scraped vanilla beans to make either vanilla sugar or your own homemade vanilla extract! (Yes, you CAN do that.)

While that's melting, combine the vinegar, sour cream, and almond milk. You can use coconut, hemp, or oat milk as well if you have a nut allergy. Let this sit near the stove to take the chill off of it, and let sit for at least 5 minutes. Your butter should melt within that time. Once it's melted, set it aside while you whisk together your flour/cornstarch with the sugar of your choice. Add in your eggs and whisk quite well. Add in the vanilla butter and whisk to incorporate quite well. Add the nutmeg, 'buttermilk' mixture and whisk quite well, ensuring that every single last bit of everything is incorporated quite well. If I were you, I'd take my time to pop this mixture into a large pitcher (the one on your blender works just fine) before continuing with this next step.

Carefully open your oven door and - using oven mitts - remove the blind baking instruments you've used, if any, be they beans, rice, or baking beads. Set them aside to cool. Pull our the oven rack that holds your pie dish out just enough to safely pour your custard in without burning your hands. Pour your custard mixture in very slowly indeed, and then very gently indeed push the rack back into the oven, trying to not jostle the custard so it won't spill. Shut the oven door, lower the temperature, to 325 and bake for 50 minutes, or until the custard wobbles just barely in the middle. The pie will have quite a dome on it, which is fine, because it'll collapse once it cools. Remove from the oven and allow to cool for at least two hours in the fridge - one hour on the counter, one in the fridge.


Slice and serve with some sweet tea and sit on the veranda to enjoy maximum flavor. Please let me know if you do try this, of course! It's one of my favorite custard pies, and I think the whole wheat crust adds to it by balancing out some of the sweetness. I've also made this recipe with half parts AP flour and rye flour with great success. Don't be afraid to experiment!

Happy cooking and happy eating! 

Wednesday, February 14, 2018

Strawberry Sweetheart Pie

You don't have to use this design, but I personally love it.
I love pie, but here's the thing: it's not easy. Oh, sure, there's the expression "it's as easy as pie," but I assure you that it is the simplest of things that are the easiest to screw up. There are about a billion tricks and 'hacks' to make pies easier, but if you need that many hacks, you need to acknowledge that it's not an easy thing. A pie is something with a decent amount of moving parts, and you need to respect that. That being said, don't let me stop you from making a pie for your sweetheart.

You can also court your loved one by putting the raspberries on your
fingertips and chase them around the house. Because, you know, why
not spice things up?
Here's a quick note about holy basil and rosewater. Roses are a sign of many goddesses of love, such as Venus or Freya. Holy basil is sacred in Hindu medicine, said to relieve anxieties and even cause prophetic dreams. Both of these also taste great, add lovely notes to your pie...but why not add a tiny touch of magic to your love life? 

Strawberry Sweetheart Pie
  • 10.5 oz AP flour (2 cups + 1 Tbsp)
  • 8 oz (2 sticks) vegetable shortening/lard
  • Vodka A/N
  • 1 pt strawberries, cleaned and sliced
  • 2/3 c honey
  • 1/2 c powdered sugar
  • 1/2 tsp vegan gelatin
  • 1/2 tsp kosher salt
  • 6 oz raspberries
  • 1 Tbsp rosewater
  • 1 tsp dried holy basil
First thing's first - combine the berries in a bowl and salt them. Add in the rosewater, holy basil, and sprinkle the gelatin over it, doing your best to not get any clumps. Give the berries a good stir and allow to sit, covered with plastic wrap, and macerate. Meanwhile, make your pie crust.

Here's my favorite way to do it: 

Pop your flour in the bowl of a standing mixer and pop it in the freezer - yes, flour and all - while you measure out your shortening and cut it up into small pieces. You can freeze the pieces, too, of course, but it's not 100% necessary. (You want everything cold, as cold as possible.) When cold, bring everything together using the paddle attachment of your standing mixer. No, really! Just pop in the fat and let the paddle cut it in without warming it - a standing mixer has no body heat. Once the fat is about the size of a pea, add in about a tablespoon of vodka at a time to just bring things together. Bring the dough up together in a ball and cut the ball in half. Press each half into some plastic wrap to form a disc. Pop the discs in the freezer for at least 30 minutes, or in the fridge overnight. Up to you.

When you're ready, set your oven to 350 degrees F and place your baking rack on the bottom-most rung. Gently spray a pie dish - glass or ceramic is ideal, but a metal tin will suffice. Take two sheets of parchment paper and spray liberally with pan-spray. Unwrap one of your discs and sandwich it between these sheets, lubed-side on the dough. Simply rolling out your dough like this does two things: keeps it from adding excess flour, and makes it unbelievably easy to clean up. Line your pie tin with your dough, and allow to rest in the pan while you roll out your second disc.

Juicy? Oh yeah. You need that liquid for the gelatin to activate!
Here's another trick: sprinkle about a teaspoon of equal parts cornmeal and cornstarch in the bottom of your crust before you add in your filling. This tiny little extra something contributes to your pie bottom not being soggy, and nobody likes a soggy bottom.

Now that you've gotten your filling macerated, add in your powdered sugar and honey, and stir until well-combined. It might be a little weird and grainy - that's because of the gelatin. Don't fret! Pour your filling into your untrimmed dough-lined pie tin. Fluff up the edges on the pie just to make sure that you've gotten everything completely covered.

With your second half of dough rolled out, you can cut out shapes. I chose a small round cutter, that was about an inch in diameter, and punched out holes at equal intervals. You can choose anything, even small hearts for Valentine's Day! You can now take a bit of milk or water, dip your finger in it, and line the crust to moisten. Carefully lift the dough by the parchment sheet and flip it over so all you have to do is gently peel off the top layer of paper to reveal a nice pie crust layered on top.

Now you can trim the edges! You can also re-roll out those edges to make more circles, so you can decorate your now-assembled pie. You can use an eggwash if you aren't 100% committed to this being vegan, or a simple mixture of dairy-free milk substitute and sugar to wash the top instead. It's your pie, so you do what you like.

Place the pie on a sheet tray lined with foil to catch anything that might leak over the sides, and bake at 350 on the bottom-most run of the oven(this also helps get a crisp bottom) for about 45 to 50 minutes, or until both bottom and top are a crisp brown. (This is another reason a glass pie tin is ideal.)

Evacuate the pie and let cool for at least 2 hours. I like to do half of that cooling at room temperature and then the rest in the fridge. You want two hours because strawberry has pectin that will help it gel naturally, but the gelatin you've added will give it that extra staying power, which will look quite lovely when you've sliced into it. Otherwise, everything will spill out and you'll definitely get a soggy bottom from that juicy liquid gold going out.

This pie is pleasantly tart, so serve with some nice cream or powdered sugar on top, or even some dairy-free whipped topping. If you start now, you can have it ready in plenty of time to serve to your sweetheart tonight. Or, you know, for yourself when you're living your best life, watching horror movies on Netflix. Yes, you should watch horror movies on Valentine's Day if you're celebrating it alone. Why? Because if you watch horror movies in your house, alone, you won't feel alone by the time it ends.



Happy baking and happy eating!